I have been through a lot in my past, but I wouldn’t change one bit of it. My past has made me the person I am today. I am proud of how my life has turned out and I’m proud of the person I have become.
In honor of my past, I prepared a speech. Alright everyone raise them glasses up high. Here’s to all my past relationships and experiences. You know who you are.
-Here’s to the skater boy with all the great moves
-And here’s to the male stripper I use to date. Thank you for the striptease that you would do for every A I got in college. That’s motivation at it’s finest!
-Here’s to the cowboy That could really fill out them jeans.
-Here’s to the tattoo artist. You were one hell of a kisser.
-Oh and here’s to the ginger with good vibes. http://crazyredders.com/?s=good+vibe
-Here’s to the idiot that wanted a prenup when he didn’t have anything lol
-Here’s to the mechanic. Thanks for the free service.
-Here’s to the mama’s boy who refused to kiss on the first date. Hey there’s nothing wrong with that.
-Here’s to the military guy for showing up at my door for our second date holding his alarm clock. You made it real easy for me to kick you to the curb.
-And here’s to the lunatic that chased my car down because I cancelled our date. I guess my instincts were right.
And here’s to the rest that didn’t make the list today. Thanks for all the different and unique experiences. Each and every one of you brought me a step closer to the sexy redneck from the rocks. (rocks short for mckees rocks)
Keep your glasses raised up, not done yet. Here’s to all the parties, clubbing, bonfires, camping and fishing trips, karaoke bars. Here’s to friendships, heartaches, losses, tears, and here’s to all the times I got lost because I have bad sense of direction. I guess bad direction can be good too. I found love without a gps lol
All of this plus more has led me to the Redneck From The Rocks. One of the many blessings my past led me too. And I will be forever thankful for that.
Here’s to the past everyone. Cheers!!
So here it is. It was 5am and my alarm was ringing. After hitting the snooze button a couple of times, I finally got up and headed to the back door to let the dogs out to pee. After I let them back in, I then headed to the bathroom to start getting ready for work. I walked up to the sink and grabbed my toothbrush and then grabbed what I thought was the toothpaste, but soon would find out different. I then took the tube of whatever and squeezed a little of the white substance on my toothbrush. I then put it up to mouth and started brushing. After a few seconds of brushing, I noticed that my mouth felt weird, and the taste was different. I looked at my toothbrush and kept thinking what was wrong with my toothpaste, because it tasted fine yesterday. I also noticed that it was very greasy. I thought something was wrong, so I started to rinse my mouth out, but it was so greasy and hard to rinse out. I couldn’t even get out of my brush. I then looked down at the tube of whatever I squeezed on my toothbrush, (probably should have looked sooner) and it didn’t say toothpaste. It said BALMEX. With balmex still in my mouth, Out loud I said Oh- My- God. My husband must have heard me, because he came running to the bathroom as if he thought I got hurt or something. He asked me what was wrong, and I told him. He just busted out laughing. He was laughing so hard, he had to leave the bathroom. He couldn’t look at me no more without laughing. It took me about 20 minutes to get it out of my mouth. But I still tasted it in my mouth the rest of the day. It was a very bad taste in my mouth and I’ll never forget the taste. I am forever traumatized. Ever since this happened, I make sure I look at everything now. My husband will never let me live this one down lol
So have any of you had any similar experiences ? Or has this happened to you? I want to hear all about it.